Next Man Up, Poetry in Motion

Announcer 0:00
This is a KUNV Studios original program. The

Wesley Knight 0:05
content of this program does not reflect the views or opinions of 91.5 Jazz and more, the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, or the Board of Regents of the Nevada System of Higher Education.

Donavan LeDean 0:15
Here we go! Here we go! Move it! Move it! Move it!

Yeah.

Beautiful. Next man up.

Dave. Let's go.

Hello and welcome to the show. I am your host, Donovan Ledeen, actor, author, and inspirational rhythmic poet. Get out to dance and expand. Next man up, poetry in motion, where the mission is to promote good mental health for everyone. This poetry show will motivate, educates, and inspire you with spoken word through cultural expression. We have a special guest in the building, Miss Maymay Mihadas, aka Mayroses Bloom, is a Filipino American poet, author, artist, and mental health advocate residing in Las Vegas, Nevada. Raised as an army brat, she spent her childhood across Texas, Tennessee, California, and Germany. Miss May May Queen, thank you for being here.

Mei-Mei Mijares 1:30
Thank you so much for having me, Jonathan. This is my very first time on a radio show, so I'm very excited. Yes,

Donavan LeDean 1:35
yes, yes. So, Maymay, let's talk about it. All right.

Mei-Mei Mijares 1:40
Absolutely.

Donavan LeDean 1:41
This is so. Next man up. Poetry in motion is a humanitarian radio show dedicated to mental health, and you are a mental health advocate. In your bio, you've mentioned that you and quote balance your bittersweet experiences with ways of healing and self love to encourage readers that they can always find flowers in the fractures. End quote. For our listeners, please elaborate on how your drive and passion for mental health advocacy through writing and poetry came about.

Mei-Mei Mijares 2:16
I think it definitely stemmed from my own mental health journey. I have had like panic attacks since I was eight years old. I grew up in a very traditional Filipino family where emotions are not the most expressed. It's better for you to keep them suppressed and everything for the collective, and to be strong, especially in the military family. Is

Donavan LeDean 2:39
that a stigma? That's

Mei-Mei Mijares 2:41
oh absolutely, gosh, it is such a huge stigma for us, and there actually culturally we don't have words for mental health illnesses, so it's just a different thing. Especially because we are so community based, we have a lot of community support there, so the individual mental health journey was very different for me growing up in the U.S. as a Filipino American. So I started writing poetry in eighth grade. It was a way for me to express my emotions. That was one of the times in my life where depression really started stemming and and blooming, I guess, for lack of a better word. I try to look at it as a as another part of me. There was a lot of loneliness and a lot of helplessness, especially when I had to be the example for my younger siblings, so I had to play caretaker, second parent while my dad was deployed enough, like Afghanistan, Iraq, all of the works. Like he was in active combat, so I'm just a kid with all of these parental responsibilities, and I can't really talk about it. So I started journaling, and I started writing, and I continued doing that until college. And then I found Poets Club at UC Santa Barbara, and it really opened my world into a community where you are allowed to share unapologetically, you get to stand on tables and tell your truth. I was able to talk about my mental health problems and like things that are touchy, like suicidal ideation and self harm, and all of those things while I was in like active recovery because I was getting supported by other poets, so like I know there's no art for me without regarding my mental health and vice versa.

Donavan LeDean 4:49
Okay, you've mentioned that you were raised as an army brat, having the opportunity to travel and live in different places. How did that shape you as a person and how you view the world?

Mei-Mei Mijares 5:05
So the symbol for the military brat is the dandelion, which I think is funny because it's like, oh yeah, dandelions can grow anywhere, but we are also seen as a weed. So in in the same way that dandelions are very adaptable and enduring, and you can go across borders no matter what, and you can grow anywhere. You can make a home anywhere as a military brat. It's also very isolating. You're very. We grow up different in a way where we always are like looking for another like the parent is gone or something like we or and then when they come back we our whole system is changed. There is also the fact that when we PCOS, which is like permanent state change of station, you can get three months notice before you have to move to another state. So even when I moved from Tennessee to Germany, that was I got a three months notice as a sophomore in high school that I was going to move to a different country. So it made me very adaptable, super hyper vigilant. I'm a big believer in home can be made anywhere, and love is enduring across borders. I have friends from all of the different places that I have lived. I have moved over 13 times, and I had experiences of being like you know the only Asian Filipino in the room, or the only one who wasn't mixed with something else, and it led me to really appreciate my culture and to be able to learn all the recipes and all the things that to keep me grounded in my identity, and it like made me understand the breadth and depth of people about families, how you can like look at someone and really not know what their story is. Like I have friends, you know, just like white hair, blue eyes, curly curly hair. Well, yeah, like white blue eyes, curly hair. Born in Japan, you know. And then another one of my friends, he is super alternative, very skater like vans and everything. He had never been in the U.S. really before college, so it was a huge culture shock for him. He he lived in Germany his entire life, so we get these very Intersectional people, and I think that helped me in the long run in my future because, like, as a therapist, as a mental health advocate, because people are so different everywhere, and I can love anywhere, and I can learn about people anywhere. Sorry, I think I lost my train of thought. That's okay.

Donavan LeDean 8:05
Not a problem. Not a problem. It's a very uncertain and tumultuous time happening within our society, challenging our mental health and also our way of life. With everything that is happening around us, how does poetry play a significant role within our society?

Mei-Mei Mijares 8:25
Something that I grew up with was reading poetry. I read poetry a lot in schools. I remember in high school, the house on Mango Street was something that changed my life. It was a very honest depiction about a Latina girl who grew up during like the white flight in LA, and understanding that people will be are moving away from you because you are different in some way. And I and I think that when I read that as a kid, I learned poetry is honesty. It's expression, and it's it's it's also like a form of protest. Like I am my my existence is resistance. Like with me being here, I am I am a Filipina bisexual, like hippie-like woman. You know, live in Vegas. My my siblings like make fun of me for being like so hippie-like and everything. But I think that it's poetry is so important now because like we are in such a technological panopticon state, where you people are afraid of being recorded, people are afraid of dancing and expressing themselves, making weird faces in public or anything like that. They're just hyper aware of embarrassment all the time because of like our lens of social media. How that. Plays a role in our lives, so I think poetry is a way of telling like the unabashed truth of your story, and I think that that's important right now to show to show youth, to show like our young adults, like to to read poetry and to like look at people like my my Angela, like to be able to talk about your struggles of like sexual abuse in your family, you know, in a book, like in like I know why the caged bird sings. Like it's important for us to be able to talk about these hard things because we're being locked down to where we're afraid to express it all, and it's it's just lonely. So I think that poetry is a way for us to connect with others and to feel like we're part of a community and alive.

Donavan LeDean 10:55
Well said. And you have a book that's out. I do. Yeah. Elaborate for our listeners a little bit more about your book.

Mei-Mei Mijares 11:05
So, Unabashed is my poetry memoir. I have poems and scans and pictures of it from when I was a baby, growing up into adulthood. I have poems in there from middle school, high school, college, and where is

Donavan LeDean 11:26
it available?

Mei-Mei Mijares 11:26
It is actually available in Barnes and Noble online. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Or at the Barter Mall at Bruhex Bookstore. Okay. Yeah.

Donavan LeDean 11:37
Okay. And before we go, Miss Maymay will be sharing an inspirational song while playing her guitar. You ready?

Mei-Mei Mijares 11:46
Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Let me go ahead and unwrap this.

Donavan LeDean 11:49
All right.

Mei-Mei Mijares 11:49
So this is one of the songs that I wrote way back when, in like 2019, after I graduated college, because it was when I first started my mental health journey, and I was cutting out people' Habits, patterns that weren't working for me anymore, and now that I think about it, I fell back into those patterns. But I think this song reminds me that my healing isn't linear, and neither is yours. So no matter where you are right now, you will you will absolutely get to where you want to be. I really do believe that.

Speaker 1 12:24
Yeah,

Mei-Mei Mijares 12:25
this is called eggs.

Donavan LeDean 12:26
Tell it's on. Okay.

Mei-Mei Mijares 12:40
Mending hurts is my specialty. I'll cook you eggs with a sign of guarantee. Come on, name, and I'll always come running. Oh, you. gotta do is tell me you love me. And I'll always leave the light on. So when you get home, you know I'm there for you. Once you turn 'em off, I'll crawl in bed thinking, what about me? And then I'll go to sleep dreaming. Is there more for me out there? Dreaming, wouldn't it be unfair to him? never break my heart, just beat it bloody. Much too scared to teach him how to love me, so he left me lie to me, cheat on me. Tell me who to be. Hit me, compare me, push me. I'll be a devotee. Tell me it's all because you love me, not by hate. And I'll always leave the light on. So when you get home, you know I'm there for you. Once you turn 'em off, I'll lie in bed thinking what about me, and then I'll go to sleep dreaming. Store more for me out there. Dreaming, wouldn't it be unfair to him or me when you cried to me at the end of the line? Maybe I'll remember your tears on mine. Maybe I'll remember I deserve better, and I'll buy it. Breaking hearts is my specialty. Cook my eggs with a side of healing, and sprinkle them with dreaming. There's more for me out there. Dreaming, wouldn't it be unfair to? Him, hold me to Him, to me, to Him, to me, to Him, to me, to Him, to me, to him, to him, to him, to me, to me, to me, to me, to him. Wouldn't it be in faith? Wouldn't it be

Donavan LeDean 16:33
Sensational! You heard it right here, Miss May

Mei-Mei Mijares 16:40
Mayarest,

Donavan LeDean 16:41
Queen. Man. Thank you for your time.

Mei-Mei Mijares 16:45
Thank you for having me. We appreciate you.

Donavan LeDean 16:47
Pleasure. The poets that will be featured on our playlist today are Malika Bella, protected poet, Rachel Davera Winninger, Elena Noel, Sheldon Alex Sebastian, Yaya, Doctor Joshua Gray, Chelsea Marais, and Donovan leading. Now let's get on with the show. This is next man up. Poetry in motion. Here we go. Here we go. Next man up. That girl from way back south, she got me southern dreaming, thick and creamy, fine, brown, sweet as mine. Special pies, that girl from way back south, she got me southern dreaming, brown through shaving. She ain't made my soul, body and mind. She prances through the fields of the magnolias. She's flaunting them thick curves as a groove, a slow rhythm compelled by melody, a hummingbird. Country girl was striking for zeal. Sex appeal never discreet. Guitar plays, celebrating her beauty with southern reals. Human moist from the Gulf, moist the skin, sexy suck. A product to the buyer, so fierce she make your knees buckle. She's collectible like cornbread, oxtails, that southern cuisine. Such a treat, like that Louisiana crawfish on my feet.

Speaker 1 18:14
She got the remedy. This dream feels so real.

Donavan LeDean 18:25
Affection runs deep like OGs for classic empowers and Cadillacs. Tastes like rise slow. What she ammatizes is factor. She got that fire, hot sauce with intellect. That southern swagger. The culture stretches wide along mosquito creeks and swamps. Nothing else matters. She's sweet as Georgia peach, southern victim with hospitality. She got that good goo. A seduction too good to be reality. Man, look at how she moving.

Speaker 1 18:54
Smooth chop, chopping smooth. Got my

Donavan LeDean 19:00
mind screwed up. This is ecstasy. I close my eyes, don't wake me up. She's vivacious like family cookouts. Those Friday afternoons, two-step dip groove. R&B eating my soul food. Natural beauty, she wears a natural from the root skin. Unnatural glow, so natural this queen. She calls me king. Can't let this one go. I'm goo.

Sheldon Alex Sebastian 19:37
Turn your face from faking to the one who gives his grace. Slow your pace from racing. Pump the brakes and show some faith. Rid your load of baggage. It's not easy making space, but that love is possibility and worthy of the chase.

Donavan LeDean 20:02
Next man up.

Liz Prince 20:04
This next one is called "You. It's for anyone who's ever lost anyone. I feel a hole in the middle of my heart. You're gone, and we will now forever be apart. How am I supposed to feel right now? I'm still in tears. I'm wondering why and how? Why did this have to happen to you? I want to go back in time. There has to be something I can do. You can't really be gone. You can't really be gone. My heart, my soul, my body aches in the pain of the thoughts of never seeing you again. We weren't ready for you to leave us yet, but from now on, I'll remember you every time the sun sets.

Speaker 2 20:53
Standing on the peaks of a nation with our wings perched in anticipation, overlooking the cityscape, preparing for our next escape. We want to conquer. We want to succeed. We want to fly. We want to soar. We want to jump. We want to leap. We want to catapult into all greatness. As our eyes pierce one destination, bound to touch an array of generations, our wings prepare to spread out large, accepting our journey out far. Can we conquer? Can we succeed? Can we fly? Can we soar? Can we jump? Can we beat? Can we catapult into all greatness? The wind begins to appear manifest, and the heat of the sun becomes the test. But we are able to defeat opposition because conquering is our definition. We will conquer. We will succeed. We will fly. We will soar. We will jump. We will leap. We will catapult into all greatness. You really want to conquer? You really want to succeed? You want to jump into all greatness in a day and age like this? Yes. Fact. For we do not only want to, but we shall conquer. We shall succeed. We shall fly. We shall soar. We shall jump. We shall leap. We shall catapult into all greatness.

Donavan LeDean 22:16
Next man up, Dave.

Yahya 22:17
This poem. I don't do a lot of soliloquies, but it's just kind of what poetry is to me, right? And how I think it affects people.

Speaker 1 22:26
King,

Yahya 22:28
talk to him. Poetry is more abstract than modern. See, we got more gods than goblins, more Batmans than robins. See, it's like this field of dreams, and nobody's picking cottons. Why ancestors are revered instead of forgotten? See, poetry is an avenue in which you can travel through to bring clarity. So I loosely give you this air to breathe, and fruits that bear seeds, and seeds that bear keys, and keys that bear deeds to open the door, help you see the things you want to see, and help you see be the place where you want to be. Be a right or wrong, back to fantasy through this creative soul. Poetry is see. Poetry is writing to recite with the insight of Morpheus, becoming this poetry contortionist with poems screaming from every orifice while I'm speaking. My spoken word becomes the beacon to elevate those in the streets who need reaching, mass communication, eat syllable, eat silly, please. Be teaching. See speech not spoken, just to be speaking. See what cut wrists I do this. I'm the Islamic activist with the Quran in my right hand and prayer beats clenched in left foot with God body clearance, acknowledging He who has injured in this. See my kufi state intact to deflect negative interference. See, our situation is getting coarse. See, cast floss will maintain a divine mind loss, but there's a recourse, of course, and the cost is innocent corpse. So I seek out the source and go to battle with Eric's until my pen locks in with the floss, and then I, I turn him to the dark side. See, I lock him down for that Nourse authorized, then I slay just one of them, so they can experience the root of genocide. But until then, my tongue will ride on the kinetic wave of my ancestry, 'cause at this degree I speaks out in his native tongue of poetry. Poetry is my depth, and sometimes it feels like poetry is all that I have left. That's what poetry is to me.

Donavan LeDean 24:22
Next man up.

Speaker 3 24:24
Cosmic plated palette digesting blood raw information, amethyst rock powdered form high off imagination, intuitive scans of sensory sensing spirit being laced with etheric being confirmation compared with elephant steps trampled grass effects on flesh attempts of disrupting communication ital dreadlocks deadlocked onto signals phoning home home. Where I yearn to sail freely in the waves of sound, 1000s of times before a single vibration can caress the ground. Speed of light echoed through a flash seems to ever last, transmuting messages to my past until the present soaks up a splash, commuting from a new wave of inspiration. Droplets, a pigment of sky, rain down seeping into four chambers to lie in a flower bed of the hard soil, raising seed variations of inspiration as thoughts arise, just as sun and moon combine, the way seen and unseen collide in an eclipse of synchronization. The diamond pointed instant, the moment and mind align. If only I could bottle up this glimpse of time to set freely to surf in the celestial seas, while I ponder day-dreat lifetimes to find lucid words to define how grateful I am for my spirit to unwind, cradled in the hands of the Most High every time I am baptized in a new wave of inspiration.

Alaina Noelle 26:32
My mother asks me to unload the dishwasher to let out its most recent meal of dirty dishes, and as I reach down to undo the clasp, the steam seeps out, and the dishwasher screams on its hinges, and it sounds like the dishwasher is asking its God why it's being ripped from its resting place. And I wonder when I'll become the kind of person that prays for guidance instead of swearing to God. And I wonder if I'll ever believe in the God that I swear to, or if maybe I should start swearing to something like soap, and maybe the dishwasher isn't creaking from years of work, but it's crying, and it isn't steam from the heat of the wash, but from the pressure, and the tears still wash dishes the same, don't they? And I wonder if the spoons feel the same way, or if anyone ever thought to ask them how they felt. And I think about them stuck in the dishwasher with their soft edge, and they're surrounded by so much of the opposite-forks and knives and knives and forks-and I wonder which one I'm more like. And I wonder if my edges will ever be spoon-smart. And I have to pull a plate out of the way from the bottom rack before I can pull it out. And it makes me think about all the room I made for things that didn't fit, and how I tried to fit in rooms that I wasn't meant to be in, and I wonder if the dishes have noticed a difference in the brands of soap over the years, and if they miss the old brands over the new ones, and then I start to wonder if they're even capable of wondering where something like that went, and then I think about all the times that I tried to, and I think that I might be more like a plate, and when I think about how I thought I was going to leave, but I was just too afraid because I didn't think I really fit here. So when my mother asks me to unload the dishwasher, I do it quietly, and I ask the dishwasher if it can introduce me to the God it believes in as I start to unpack it.

Donavan LeDean 28:17
Next man up, Kane. Talk to him. I'm

Protected Poet 28:21
unhappy and unknown. Hey, what was my brother to do? Ex-convict conflicted between having one foot in the streets, the other foot on a banana peel. He slipped, fell for the banana in the tailpipe. Now he facing three strikes. It hurted like a twisted, turned knee when the district attorney turned into Wayne Brady and said, "Let's make a deal. 25 years is our best offer. Hey, then he turned into Howie Mandel and said, "Deal or no deal. My brother said, "No deal. Now to this day, my bigger brother's facing open cases. Hey, hey, hey, Howie, tell me how we supposed to tell his three kids father's now facing life. Now the only time they can face father is on FaceTime. So I stomp my feet. Hey, I stopped my feet so much it feels like I got Achilles heel. Can you give me some words of wisdom on how to heal? I just wanted to be happy and kick it with my friends. Hey, what do you do when your best friend kills your best friend? You innocent by association, but now both families feel you guilty by affiliation. Hey, how am I supposed to decide on how to pick a side, a side from being indecisive? I'm unhappy.

Donavan LeDean 30:30
Next man up, Boss English. Before we let you go, I would like for you to share a poem for us.

Walter English 30:38
So this is a pants home called "Thoughts from a black boy in America.

Speaker 1 30:47
Ready?

Walter English 30:48
Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

Donavan LeDean 30:50
Boss English. K. Salto. I

Walter English 30:56
am the one in front of the gun. I am terrified. I know I won't live forever. I haven't even reached my prime. I am terrified, like a rookie at the free throw line. I haven't reached my prime yet. My life is riding on this shot, like a rookie at the free throw line. My heart is racing, yet my life is riding on this shot. My hands are up. My heart is racing. I try to seem less like a threat. My hands are up. I'm doing everything you said. I try to seem less like a threat. Mama, look. I'm doing everything you said. Why does this hurt, Mama? Look, I the one in front of the gun. Why does this hurt? I know I won't live forever. I am the one in front of the gun. I am terrified. I know I won't live forever, haven't even reached my point.

Donavan LeDean 32:02
Before we go, I would like to conclude with a power message. It's a message about purpose over loyalty. You can be loyal yet be led to destruction. Purpose is knowing your identity and having the discernment of knowing where to go for survival and for prosperity, loyalty can lead to compromise. Purpose leads to zero regrets while maintaining moral dignity. There's no margin for error, so you know what you got to do: move with purpose. Thanks for tuning in to Next Man Up, Poetry in motion. I am your host, Donovan Ledeen. To see my inspirational and poetry reels, you can go to YouTube at Donavilly Dean. Also, you can find my poetry books, children's books, and coloring books on Amazon under my name, Donovan Ledeen. For actor or poets bookings, you can contact me dvmedia one zero@gmail.com. Special thanks to my guest, Miss May Mayares, for stopping by, discussing advocacy and mental health. I am Down of LED, actor, author, and inspirational rhythmic poet. Until next time, peace. Dave.

Drive. Drive.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai